Freedom for captives

I had a wonderfully strange dream last night. The symbolism is obvious, so I'll spare you the commentary. I was buff and stocky and walking around in very dreary gray 5-6 story building. In walked four people of graduated sizes, and they were shackled. They were buff and stocky, too--even the one that was 2 feet high. Fear came over me, and I somehow obtained an automatic weapon and found a hiding spot. I was cornered, and I knew that at any time I could be shot, and I didn't have any way to help the others. All of the sudden, the building opened up from the walls in a lot of places, and people started streaming out, including the four who were shackled. I knew that I didn't need the weapon any more. I woke up, and realized that Zane had found his way into our bed, and we were "spooning". I picked him up and took him back to his room, very thankful that I didn't wake before the end of the dream. I had an incredible peaceful feeling come over me.

Our help

We wait in hope for the Lord;
He is our help and our shield.
Psalm 33:20

We have received so much encouragement today. So many have responded to the call for the bone marrow registry (www.marrow.org), and I am confident that this is a good thing. In all of this, we realize the importance of looking at a bigger picture that just us and our family. I don't mind at all asking the Lord for help for me, but at the same time, it is wonderful to see something good come out of all of this junk for others as well. This registry drive has the potential to help hundreds of other people in my situation over the course of years. May His name be glorified. May He be called good.

We wait, but we're not exactly sitting by the phone. Zane is getting quicker and savvier. A can opener and a can of Spaghetti-Os...coffee grounds in various containers....a package of hot dogs and kitchen shears. That was all just today. Maybe he will be a chef one day. A very quick chef.

Cade loved his new karate class. "I got all sweaty!", he said, beaming.

Avi is taking full advantage of Zane's generous spirit. She can fuss and look at him, and he will give her a bite of whatever he is chomping on. After I picked them up at Mother's Day Out today, he shared a bite of his banana with her in the car. It was quite messy, so I had to grit my teeth to commend him.

We've started the medical path, so I keep forgetting to ask the Lord to just simply heal me. I know He can, so I'm asking that He will. I am so thankful for all of you who are asking with me. I picture myself as the woman who touched Jesus' garment in anticipation of a miracle. He's that good.

That's what I'm talkin' 'bout.

From Psalm 18:

In my distress I called upon the Lord,
And cried to my God for help;
He heard my voice out of His temple,
And my cry for help before Him came into His ears.
Then the earth shook and quaked;
And the foundations of the mountains were trembling
And were shaken, because He was angry.
Smoke went up out of His nostrils,
And fire from His mouth devoured;
Coals were kindled by it.
He bowed the heavens also, and came down
With thick darkness under His feet.
He rode upon a cherub and flew;
And He sped upon the wings of the wind.
He sent out His arrows, and scattered them,
And lightning flashes in abundance, and routed them.
Then the channels of water appeared,
And the foundations of the world were laid bare
At your rebuke, O Lord,
At the blast of the breath of Your nostrils.
He sent from on high, He took me;
He drew me out of many waters.
He delivered me from my strong enemy,
And from those who hated me, for they were too mighty for me.
They confronted me in the day of my calamity,
But the Lord was my stay.
He brought me forth also into a broad place;
He rescued me, because He delighted in me.

Hope on the Horizon

We have a possible kinda-maybe-okay match! I'm not at all sure what this means at all, except that it is the first pleasant news about my health that we've heard in several months. I'll take it! We are still praying for a simple touch from the Lord, or a perfect match or anything that can heal me, but this is definitely encouragement that puts a little spring in our step. This person still may not be the best direction to head. This is step five in a process of 3,156, so we still have a long way to go. We are thankful.

(I will probably never know who matches with me, but it is hilarious to think about a twin sitting off the coast of Spain, or the Alps, or North Africa, or Germany, or England...probably not China... speaking a language that I can't speak. Do they have freckles, too? Do they crave chocolate at 3pm or resist the football season? How in the world can a person that has different parents be closer to my DNA than my own family? I told you that I wasn't interested in the genetics and that it was depressing to think about, but the hope of a real person out there is actually quite amusing. I suppose it is amusing because what can be more interesting that a person just like me? Har, har, har!)

Van wisely kicked me out of the house today for a bit of a walk. The sun was setting, and I actually saw a silver lining on a cloud. It was the shape of a George Washington wig and then morphed into a duck with three lips, but nevertheless was gorgeous.

Zane is a wild man. He is climbing across the stove to the canisters to mix the sugar to the flour and the flour to the sugar. He is finding candy that I didn't even know we had, and he is learning the art of "Tade it me." (Cade hit me.) Lip out. I, in return, am a wild woman. I can drop a stack of laundry in a flash just in time to grab the child on the third bookshelf. I can hear the sound of mischievous silence. I am tired at the end of the day, but that kid is just plain funny. The house is a wreck, but he is funny.

Cade is progressing to a new martial arts class because his teacher wants him to be challenged. I'm very proud that he is showing such an interest and such a maturity. I'm on a high this afternoon because the precious angel child told me, "You're the best Mom I never knew in the whole world."

Avi spent her day putting things into laundry baskets and then trying to figure how to get them back out. I am so glad, because I really needed her to be happy and occupied so I could watch the other two climb the curtains! She is taking about 3 bottles a day now, and gets all excited and impatient when I'm making them! I am so thankful. This is a huge burden off of our shoulders knowing that others can care for her.

Van says he has no update.

I am expecting a call from the transplant doc tomorrow to discuss the potential kinda-sorta match. Please continue to pray.

No news is... well....no news.

The answer to the ever-popular question, "What's the update?" is "Nothing." We simply have not heard back about a match, so we wait. Usually, after a person hears that I have no news, I am asked a bunch of questions based in genetics, and I just don't know the answers to these questions, either. In fact, although they are terribly interesting things to ponder, it is a scary time of life to take much time to think about how truly unique a person's DNA is, so I would prefer to talk about wallpaper or Jimmy Dean sausage or just about anything. Just keep praying, please. I know He listens.

But, because you love us and care about us, I'll assume that you want to hear our funny of the day. Zane escaped his car seat on the way to Mother's Day Out. I told Cade that the next time they got in the car I would need him to switch car seats with Zane because his is harder to unbuckle. Cade responded, "NO! Zane's car seat is stinky!!!" Zane (who talks very little) said, "I no stinky--YOU stinky!" I have been laughing all day about it.

Avi is waving and clapping and is thoroughly entertained by her big brothers.

Our church, Crestview Church of Christ, is having a national bone marrow donor drive on Sept 30 from 5:30-9:30. Anyone interested may have their cheeks swabbed (sounds fun?) to be entered into a drawing....not really...to be entered into the national registry for people like me who need to borrow very specific healthy blood. If you are ever matched, you will have the option of saving someone's life by a non-taxing IV procedure. If you are not from Waco, you may check out www.marrow.org to learn more. I suppose if you are from Waco, you can do the same. We Wacoans like to use the internet, too.

Drawing Board...

My sister is not a match. This one caught us both by surprise, I think. This means that it will take 3-4 months to search through the bone marrow donor registry for a match. (Thanks to all of you who have offered to be tested. I need to google for the website for you to register to be a national donor to be eligible for me or if someone else has the need.) So...we have gone from crisis/hurry up/make preparations mode to wait patiently mode. I guess in the meantime we just go along with life as normal and keep praying.

Avi is saying "Ma-ma-ma" and "Da!" and even a sweet little "nigh-nigh" with a wave. She is a joy. Zane is just plain funny. When I went out to the car to get my purse yesterday, he managed to find the 24 pack of Dr. Peppers, rip it open, pop the top and pour himself a drink in a cup. When he saw me come back in, he panicked and dropped the can, setting it to spewing all of the kitchen. "Sowwey."

Cade had his first show and tell at Mother's Day Out, and you would have thought that he was preparing for the boards. He took Crabby, the hermit crab. He was so excited, that I was wondering if the event could live up to his expectations. Thankfully, he had great things to report, and Crabby had his moment in the limelight.

Van has been working his cute tail off, leaving before 7, coming home about 6, and bringing a stack of papers with him. Most days, he works through lunch. The responsibility of his decisions, plus our sleep deprivation make for a tired man. He has several days off, so we're going to Utopia for a break. I'm taking the zebra fabric.

We appreciate your prayers. We appreciate a God who listens and loves. May He be glorified.